Sorry -- Not

 

 "Sorry."

"So, so sorry." 

"My condolences."

"I'm sorry for your loss."

"At least he didn't suffer."

Karen responded to each one with the proper expression which she had glued on her face and a nod. Soon it would be over and people would have left, forgetting about her. forgetting about his accident.

Son Jack had flown in from California. Daughter Marilyn had driven to Maine from Boston where she was a Ph.D. candidate at Boston University.

Jack was threatening to stay for two or three weeks to "help" while Marilyn said she'd spend her Christmas break with her after Jack left so Karen wouldn't be alone. She'd deal with that in the morning.

Tonight her children would sleep in their childhood bedrooms.

The fridge was crammed with casseroles, crudities, pies and who knew what all. All their friends must be secret caterers. Marilyn had taken charge, refilling the dining table for the horde swirling around.

Looking at the people, Karen wondered which one of Seth's students was this year's lover. Probably the blond with red eyes being comforted by a girl with a black pixie and oversized earrings. Seth had been a much loved prof. Much loved.

Karen slipped into the bedroom, shut the bedroom door without turning on the light. She didn't want a sliver of light to slip under the door, revelaing her hideaway.

Picking up her mobile from the nightstand she speed dialed Tom's number.

"How's it going?"

"As horrible as I thought. I do play the grieving widow well."

"Next week at this time we'll be in Hawaii."

The expression on her face came unglued, replaced by a real smile.

 

 

FlashNano2023 The caretaker

 

The moment I arrived at Mom's I could no longer face the inevitable. It was our regular Sunday lunch, but there were no smells of a roast.

She was sitting at the table with two clocks and two watches and crying. "I can't remember how to set them back." It was two weeks before daylight savings time ended.

I gave up my flat, put my things in storage and moved into my old bedroom. I took down the Duran Duran posters and put up a favorite painting that had been in my living room, painted the walls and hung new curtains. I bought a new duvet cover.

I missed my old flat. I missed my boyfriend Hamish, especially Sunday morning breakfasts when he'd stayed over. He thought I was crazy to give up so much to go take care of my Mom. He gave me a choice her or me, which told me all I needed to know about him.

Thank goodness I can work at home.  

My brother came to Edinburgh from London to see us, the only time he did. He told me I was crazy. We should put Mom in a home.

One day a week we bake biscuits together and use a bird-shaped cookie cutter like we did when I was little. 

I'd read nasty people were nastier with dementia. Sweet people stay sweet. Her dementia increased faster than normal.  I took her after she asked if I could help her find Sally. I'm Sally. Her doctor agreed.

Her heart gave out three years, five months, and two days after I'd moved in with her.

At the funeral, I realized that I'd lost Mom twice.

 

The moment I arrived at Mom's I could no longer face the inevitable. It was our regular Sunday lunch, but there were no smells of a roast.

She was sitting at the table with two clocks and two watches and crying. "I can't remember how to set them back." It was two weeks before daylight savings time ended.

I gave up my flat, put my things in storage and moved into my old bedroom. I took down the Duran Duran posters and put up a favorite painting that had been in my living room, painted the walls and hung new curtains. I bought a new duvet cover.

I missed my old flat. I missed my boyfriend Hamish, especially Sunday morning breakfasts when he'd stayed over. He thought I was crazy to give up so much to go take care of my Mom. He gave me a choice her or me, which told me all I needed to know about him.

Thank goodness I can work at home.  

My brother came to Edinburgh from London to see us, the only time he did. He told me I was crazy. We should put Mom in a home.

One day a week we bake biscuits together and use a bird-shaped cookie cutter like we did when I was little. 

I'd read nasty people were nastier with dementia. Sweet people stay sweet. Her dementia increased faster than normal.  I took her after she asked if I could help her find Sally. I'm Sally. Her doctor agreed.

Her heart gave out three years, five months, and two days after I'd moved in with her.

At the funeral, I realized that I'd lost Mom twice.

FlashNano2023 Before Sunrise

  

The Phone Call

My phone rang in my studio. I stumbled out of bed hitting my leg on the coffee table.

Where was it? I could hear the ring.

I’m usually OCD about putting things away. Even in a small studio, things can get lost, especially when I’d come home late from work, and had to prepare for my night class tomorrow. I’m trying to get my masters while holding down a job that requires lots of overtime.

When I hit the light switch, I could see to follow the ring to my purse.

“This is Melrose Hospital. We have your mother here. She asked us to call you and tell you she was in an accident. You should come,” a woman’s voice said.

I threw on sweatpants and sweater.

Where were my keys?

My coat was hung in the closet and the keys were in the left-hand pocket.

Please let the car start, I prayed. It did on the third try.

Please let my mother be all right. We’d had a fight last week, unusual for us. I had been wrong. She had cautioned me about being over worked. She was right. I told her to butt out of my life. Left. Slammed the door. I should of called and apologized, but I was so busy. What if she died and our last words were angry? That would really suck.

At four in the morning, the roads to the hospital were deserted. So was the visitor’s parking lot.

A guard at reception sent  me to emergency. “The hospital called, they said my mother, Johnna Lewis was in an accident, I told the nurse on duty. She asked you to call me. I’m her daughter.”

“We don’t have a Johanna Lewis. There’s only one accident patient, and she asked that her daughter be called.” She looked at her notes. “We talked you and I.”

I was confused. “Is your number 617-555-2881?”

“617-555-2882.”

Now the nurse looked confused. “Oh my God, I must have hit the wrong key.”

Back in my car, I was still shaking. I’d accepted the nurse’s apologies. I felt so sorry for that woman, for her daughter. I supposed I should have been angry about the mistake, but the nurse had said she was on a double shift, staff shortages, but that wasn’t an excuse. I thought it was good enough. I’m so tired so much of the time, I make mistakes.

Even though it wasn’t yet dawn, I called my mother even though she wouldn’t be up. “Mom, I’m sorry about last week,” I said when she answered.

FlashNano 2023 Prompt: The trees know

 

There was a huge tree near where Jim and I walked the dog. The bark was thick cracks. Its roots spread out at least two feet, some intertwined.

Other trees nearby were big, but smaller, which wasn’t hard.

The trees lined a field that now only had sunflower stalks, the flowers long harvested for oil.

Fido, yes we gave our golden retriever that boring name, loved to run in the paths circling the field while Jim and I sat on a bench in the middle to watch. There was a view of Mt. Blanc that we would oh and ah over, even if we’d seen it every day for years. Sometimes it was hidden in the mist, sometimes when it was clear it was like we could see every tree. Or we imagined we could.

Jim and I would discuss the day to come. We were both retired. Sometimes we would go to a movie or a museum. We’d plan lunch with either or us cooking or going to one of the local restaurants. When Fido was ready to come home, he’d come and sit in front of us.

Now I’m retired and I’ve begun to paint and I am doing a series of water colors of trees.

I had not expected Jim to die. One minute he was laughing and then he was gone.

During the first weeks after that day, I was too busy with the funeral and follow up things I needed to do. Fido stayed with our daughter in the next town. When she brought him back, he led me to the bench the first time we went for a walk. The first thing he did was pee on the tree before running down his favorite path around the field.

It was the first time I had even been there without Jim.

As I watched Fido run, I swear the tree whispered to me, it was sorry for my loss. It was probably my imagination or the wind rustling the remaining leaves, but I like to think they were talking to me and knew what they were saying.

 

Alicia felt the cold the moment she entered the living room despite the fire in the fireplace.

Seth usually hugged her whenever she came home from anywhere, even a quick trip to the grocery store.

“I’m home,” she said.

He didn’t look up from the magazine he was reading. He read newspapers online, but he still liked magazines in paper. “I see.”

This was Seth’s night to cook. He only worked half a day on Wednesdays. Although they had been married for four years, he would set the table with candles, a single flower in a bud vase. His meals would make a gourmet chef cry with joy.

She had anticipated walking into aromas that fed her hunger. She always ate light lunches on Wednesdays. After the meal they would make love.

Could he have found out about Danny?  They had been so careful. She never talked about her ex with Seth. Never thought about her ex until two months ago they bumped into each other at the supermarket. Bumped into each other literally. Old passions were loosened by that bump, and even if she knew it was wrong, she gave into them.

“What’s for dinner?”

“Nothing. How’s Danny?”

 

 Day 1 of FlashNano2023 to prompts. This prompt was they found one body when looking for another.

"He's asleep." The bedroom door closed.

 

Jake rolled over in his bed. He'd fooled his father and mother. He was so angry at how they had dragged him out of Uncle Jim's house.

 

They'd yelled that Jake was too young at nine to hear about bodies being found, a skeleton not the a young girl they were looking for.

Jake loved listening to Uncle Jim's stories of when he was a policeman: DNA, fingerprints, a shoot out, the way to question a suspect, the bank robbers that were caught in a warehouse.

 

His father was always talking about Jake taking over his business when he grew up. The Harvard then the Harvard B School where his father had gone. Learn business, his father said.

 

Now Jake was forbidden to visit Uncle Jim. Auntie Anne always had home made cookies. She had white hair. She said, "you men can talk without me."

 

Jake saw the photos on the mantle of Jim in uniform before he retired. There were several some from before Uncle Jim went bald.

He fell asleep and dreamed about the day he would be a cop like Uncle Jim.